COFFEE BLACK
“The barista shook his head. That hedge couldn’t have moved closer overnight. Could it?”
Don't be foolish, you're just imagining things.
"Coffee, black, please?" a stranger demands.
"Yes, sir. Anything for a connoisseur of the bean?"
His face contorts. "A what? What did you call me?"
"Oh, no sir. A connoisseur an expert, someone who loves the pure taste of the coffee bean. No insult intended." I add a bear claw to his order. "No charge, please, enjoy."
"Shit, I'm sorry." He wipes his forehead with a napkin. "I'm exhausted, been driving all day. Still have hours to go. Never drink the stuff, but I need to stay awake. Thanks." He picked up the bear claw and took a bite. "Now that I consider myself a connoisseur of, d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s."
I cringe, smile, and switch off the open sign. He'll be dead before he gets the key in the ignition. His tall, lanky body is perfect.
Time to start that row of Gumby shaped hedges.
150 words
Yolanda Renee © 2015
*****
GUMBY
Since Gumby and I are too old is so unfamiliar and folks don't get the gist of the story
I thought I should post this. :)
Enjoy!
*****
25 comments:
I had to look up the word 'gumby' and now your story makes sense - good twist as always.
Wonderful done.
Not sure those hedges would be a hit with the local neighborhood lol
Great mystery/chilling story! Reminds me of Twilight Zone. loved it! Here are my two urls:
https://flashfictionforaspiringwriters.wordpress.com and http://pricelessjoy@icloud.com.
Nice story Yolanda! I like that something nasty is going to happen to the customer. Thanks again for another excellent contribution to the Mondays Finish the Story challenge, and be well... ^..^
I love you can take a pleasant looking picture and turn it into something chilling and sinister.
You always make such perfectly chilling stories in do few words.He was a jerk anyway.
I totally agree with Chrys - you have such a knack for taking something totally innocent looking and making it so creepy!! Awesome.
That was creepy and awesome!
Whoa, dude! Thank God all the Starbucks shops I frequent are in urban areas with very little greenery in their immediate vicinities! ;-)
I'm just glad I don't drink coffee! Thanks Mina, especially for posting the about the WEP - you are awesome!
Thanks, Alex, and here I thought I had telephoned it in. In the middle of edits for Murder & Obsession, I took a quick break to write it. Hubby didn't like it at all!!
Thanks Julie, you made me smile!
LOL Maurice, and yet my third book is coming in at 142000 + my editor doesn't think so.
Hi Chrys, and I honestly don't know how I do that.
The service industry takes all the sh-- it only seemed fair! Thanks Barb!
Hey Priceless, coming over for a visit! Thanks!
The complainers wouldn't last long! LOL
Thanks Yarnspinnerr, On my way over!
Thanks Sally, I thought everyone knew Gumby - but my husband had to point out it's an age thing - I'm old! LOL
I looked up "Gumby" and it could easily make a good hedge! (Gumby looks old enough that we'd never have had in the UK).
I wonder if anyone is starting to wonder where all the incredibly life-like hedges are coming from? :-)
Such a sweet little tale of murder and mayhem. Well done
Creeped me out, but that was the idea, right. Great sharp story with fab dialogue. Gum by flummoxed me too. :-)
*chuckle* ...'You gets what you pays for' - now just what was in that bearclaw???
I used to work in a coffee shop many moons ago. There were some folks I would have liked to turn into 'hedges'. :)
Not a place I'd stop for a snack. Good twist at the end. Well done, Yolanda. :) --- Suzanne
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