Wednesday, December 9, 2015


I'm truly pleased to welcome L G Keltner to my blog today to discuss her latest release and the all time holiday favorite 'outdoor lighting display.'

Take it away, L G!

I’d like to thank Yolanda for letting me stop by to promote my novella Self-Help 101 or: How I Learned to Take Over the World Through Tolerating My Family.

To get you all in the mood for some holiday fun, I’d like to celebrate outdoor lighting displays.  Most people keep them to a reasonable level, but we’ve all encountered the people who go a bit overboard.  You may even be that person.  I’ve compiled a short list of signs that may indicate that you’ve gone a bit too crazy with the holiday illumination.

#1-Planes keep trying to land in your backyard.
#2-There’s been a sharp increase in the number of car accidents outside your home, and they’ve been caused by sudden-onset blindness or distracted driving.
#3-Angry neighbors have been stealing or vandalizing your decorations.
#4-Family members and friends no longer wish to be seen at your house.
#5-News crews show up to document your lighting display.

Do you put up outdoor lighting displays?  Do you like your displays to be subtle, or do you like going all out?

Now I hope you enjoy a brief snippet from Self-Help 101 or: How I Learned to Take Over the World Through Tolerating My Family.

*     *     *
“Don’t blame yourself for this mess.  Other people’s issues are responsible for way more of it than you could possibly be.”
I laughed.  “You have to say that.”
“No, I don’t.  You can’t punch me through the phone.”
Then we were both laughing.  It was nice.  This felt normal, and it took some of the pressure off.

*      *     *


Dani Finklemeier has decided to write a self-help book about how to take over the world, but she’s not sure where to start.  After all, she’s only seventeen and looking for a better way to make money than babysitting.  She buys a self-help book that promises to teach her how to write a self-help book in the hope of getting the job done.

Not that it’ll be easy to get any work done this holiday season.  Her family is staying at the house for Christmas, and fights break out almost immediately.  Dani also has to deal with the fallout from an unexpected kiss with her best friend Seth and the feelings that go along with it.  On edge around her family and unsure how to interact with the one person she’s trusted with everything in the past, she can only take what inspiration she can from the crazy circumstances surrounding her and see what happens.

One way or another, it should be an interesting holiday.
 * * * 
L.G. Keltner spends most of her time trying to write while also cleaning up after her crazy but wonderful kids and hanging out with her husband.  Her favorite genre of all time is science fiction, and she’s been trying to write novels since the age of six.  Needless to say, those earliest attempts weren’t all that good. 

Her non-writing hobbies include astronomy and playing Trivial Pursuit.

You can typically find L.G. lurking around her blog, on Twitter, or on her Facebook page.

Purchase Links:

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  1. Thanks for hosting me! You're an amazing friend!

    1. Merry Christmas, L G - such fun lighting displays. I love them and as a child really enjoyed going for that drive around town to see all the lovely lights, my favorite was a house that did it all in only blue lights. I loved the blue lights and did my house the same way when I grew up and the kids were younger, now I just put out a few lights, still blue of course. :)
      Lighting displays are such a fun subject and quite apropos - I do hope your book does well, and it's always a pleasure to help advertise such an awesome writer.

  2. Did you know there is a television show focused on light wars? Some people spend tens of thousands of dollars on their display, which is just nuts.

    1. That does not surprise me. Some people truly do go crazy with their decorating.

  3. lol yeah, I'd never go that nuts. But if I lived beside someone who did, I'd spell out "ditto" with lights in my window and be done with it lol

  4. Hahahahahhaa... Yeah, I know a few houses that go totally overboard with Christmas lights. Here at home, though, we're lucky if we even remember to put something up before it's too late—before, say, January 10th :D As a matter of fact, on my to-do list today sits the pretty (awful) task of finding, untangling, testing, and putting up lights. Just lights, all white, and mostly indoors. There's a pine wreath somewhere (fake pine... this is the tropics); since I'm at it, I should probably look for that one, too.

    Great post... Giggled all the way through. Your book sounds amazing, L.G.; much success with it!
    Guilie @ Quiet Laughter

    1. I'm definitely the kind of person who would put off decorating until it's too late. That is, if I don't accidentally forget altogether. My husband, however, is eager to put up our tree the second he gets a chance, so that helps.

  5. Funny list and yes, I do decorate outside. Well before Halloween whilst it's still warm enough because living in a snowbelt, it's just to dang cold to wait. Then as soon as Halloween is over, we flip the switch and enjoy the outdoor fun.

    Much luck and fun with your writing.

  6. Hi LG and Yolanda. Fun post. I love Christmas lights but as I'm such a nomad I don't hang many. Just started yesterday. Lights on the deck and in the living room are left up all year round and used for parties.

    Your book sounds super fun. I will check if I've bought it!!

    Merry Christmas to you! And I hope no planes land in your backyard.


    1. Merry Christmas to you too! And don't worry, there is no danger of planes landing in my backyard. I've seen some houses where it might be a concern, though. :)


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