Monday, June 22, 2015

HOSPITALITY


HOSPITALITY

Hey boys, how ’bout y’all makin’ yer Ma some wind chimes?”

The words sounded authentic, the scene before me, even more so. A small two story house the color of the sky with white trim and a wraparound porch shouted welcome. The green trees and colorful flowers said water was plentiful. I licked my dry, cracked lips with an equally dry swollen tongue.

Each step up the wide expanse of hot red clay mixed with sharp gravel was sheer torture on bare feet. Three days ago my car broke down; I thought I could walk out, but the road changed and when I attempted to go back to my car, I ended up on a path to nowhere.


The Matriarch sitting in the rocking chair on the porch reminded me of my grandmother until she spoke.

 "Lookie hyar, fellas. Dinner's arrived, cuss it all t' tarnation. Come on now, put out th' welcome platter, we'll hafta fatten her up fust."

149 Words
Yolanda Renee © 2015

*****


This is unique flash fiction challenge is hosted by Barb Beacham, where she provides a new photo each week, and the first sentence of a story. 

Our challenge is to finish the story using 100-150 words, not including the sentence provided. Don’t forget to use the opening sentence… This challenge runs from Monday to Sunday! Get creative and have fun finishing the story!

Please include the photo with your bit of flash and a link back to this post. Do not forget to follow the link to Monday's Finish the Story and click on the blue frog. Be sure to add your link so that others can enjoy your story too! Now let’s have some fun!



41 comments:

  1. It is as though the Deliverance meets Wrong Turn.
    Very creepy take on the sentence!

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    1. Funny thing is it didn't start out there at all! I was seriously thinking of my grandmother and a scene from my childhood. How hospitable she was and what fun we had going to her house. Somewhere I took a dark turn! :)

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  2. That was a bad place to break down near!

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  3. A really great scary creepy write ~ I love the finish ~ You have constructed a great character here Yolanda ~ Well done :)

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    1. Thanks John, it did end up a bit creepy didn't it! :)

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  4. Creepy indeed!!! I swear I felt like I was there while reading this... well done!!!!.

    https://thecoastalquill.wordpress.com/

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    1. Thank you Debbie, that's quite a compliment!

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  5. Gosh I'm thirsty. Didn't take many words to create that atmosphere at all.

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    1. Love the smaller word counts for flash fiction, but somehow when I have more words and a limit, I barely make it! :)

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  6. Eeek! Great job giving us the Matriarch's voice...creepy old bat that she is! :-)

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  7. Creepy. I can hear that accent.

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  8. Creepy good! Love the last bit! Thank you Yolanda for another contribution to the MFtS challenge. Be well... ^..^

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    1. You too Barb, sorry there was conflict around this prompt - so uncalled for. The memories it triggered for me brought me here. Why the dark turn, just because - surprises are always good!

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  9. The voice is magnificent Yolanda. Deliverance all right!

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    1. An almost copy of actual family for that voice. Thank you!

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  10. Cannibals and Deliverance rolled into one.

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  11. Creepy! Cannibals have to fatten the "calf." Hope she finds a way to escape. Loved the dialogue but couldn't figure out where it was from.

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    1. Haven't thought that far ahead, maybe I should as it was in first person! :)

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  12. Y'all done gud wit dis 'un.
    Nice job.

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    1. Thank you tnkerr, your have the dialect down quite well!

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  13. Fun and freaky piece! But hey, while they fatten you up, you get more of a chance to get away, right?

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    1. Thanks Shannon, that means a lot! Your reviews of horror make me want to follow all your suggestions, but I fear too many sleepless nights ahead. :)

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  14. Hopefully she can escape before she gets to fat to run.

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    1. Hey Diane, I have you to thank for a renewed sense of confidence! And yes, I'm thinking running is a good idea, but first a taste of those delicious looking cinnamon rolls! :)

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  15. Replies
    1. Thanks yarnspinnerr - your work is magic!

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  16. They're going to eat her? Eek! Cannibalism always freaks me out.

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    1. Honestly Chrys, it does me too - it's why I hate Zombies! :)

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  17. Replies
    1. Ha, ha, it may be too late. Thanks Elizabeth!

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  18. Oh no! The MC definitely took a wrong turn somewhere.

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    1. That she did, Cherie, that she did. :(

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  19. LOL that's great. I can almost hear the banjos playing.

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  20. omg this is so creepy. Love it!
    I love these flash fiction stories, so fun to read.

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  21. Oh crumbs, I hope she was joking :-( I love the sudden change from the welcoming home, a saviour after such a long walk in the blistering heat, and then Ma's rather sinister proclamation.

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  22. Path to nowhere indeed. It sounds like this bunch has gone mad as happers, completely bonkers. Well done, Yolanda. :) --- Suzanne

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  23. Great story, Yolanda! So creepy, but I can envision everything perfectly from your descriptions!

    Lori @ The Rattling Bones

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