A Confession
See
that sky. Isn't it beautiful? Majestic? The dawn of a New Day. An epiphany upon waking.
Even
before I saw it this morning, I knew. Today would be different. Today would genuinely
be the first day of my life.
I
know trite. But it's true. Today I feel as those I were reborn. Today I
know who I am. I know what I want. And by damn, I'm going to have it!
Last
year I found myself in a blue funk. One of those where you wander around, being
and yet not fully existing. I was a ghost. Searching, and yet not knowing what
it was I was searching for. Dreaming dreams that were nightmares. And while
I was in this so-called blue funk. I did not know that I was. But something was
off. I was off.
I
didn't know whether to blame it on the pandemic, the stupidity of the political
climate, or the frighteningly dangerous failed-class clowns we elected to run
this magnificent country. Or the war where Nuclear disaster was tossed around
like babies playing a nerf ball game. Or was it that I gave myself 10 years to
succeed at writing?
Your
guess was as good as mine.
For periods, I would rally. Working on my posts for the WEP October Challenge
was the highlight. I love Halloween and enjoyed writing and posting two months
of poetry and short stories. That was when I felt like myself.
But
at the beginning of the year, I had set specific goals to finish, and by finish,
I mean publish at least 3 of the 4 projects I was working on.
It
wasn't happening.
I
was stalled!
Almost
full stop. Except for the WEP challenges. They were the only real writing I could accomplish. WEP was a lifesaver in a sea of doubt and uncertainty. I
didn't even participate in NANO. Something that always brought me success.
Where
the hell was I, and when would I find my way home? Again, I had no idea. I even
looked outside of my writing for fulfillment. Taxes, can you believe it? What
can I say? As a former accountant, taxes were always fun. I know, odd, but what
do you expect from a horror writer? 😊
Still,
while studying and preparing for the new tax season, I thought I'd found my
calling.
I
didn't!
Today,
Friday, January 13th, 2023, I know for sure, and most likely for the
first time in 12 years, that I am a WRITER!
It's
my craft.
My
happiness!
My
life's mission!
Hell,
writing is my everything!
Hello world, I'm back!
2023 GOALS
1.
Re-claim my real name—Renée Stout. Yes, folks,
I'm dropping Yolanda. It's my first name. Given to me by my mother. She loved
the combination—Yolanda Renée. So did my aunt. They were both pregnant at the
same time. I was born first, so I got the name. Which was good because my
cousin Steve would have hated growing up as Yolanda Renée. 😊
But I
was always called Renée. Mom made sure to tell all my teachers to use my middle
name. It's really who I am. Yolanda means violet. Violet? That's not me.
Renée is
of French origin, and the meaning of Renée is"reborn." Apropos, don't
you think?
So I'm
only going to be using Yolanda Renée on the last book of the Quaid series and Renée Stout on all other books.
2.
Re-Edit & Re-Publish: Love & Revenge: Tales of Murder &
Romance.
3.
Publish Murder by Proxy – NOW Murder on Mount Fairweather.
The last of the Alaskan Series. An ode to the love story between Detective Quaid
and Sarah.
4.
Publish my second book of poetry. My memoir.
5.
Publish the 1st book of Myrtle Beach
Mysteries: Her Mona Lisa Smile
6.
Finish A Stylish Murder, book 2nd of
the Myrtle Beach Mysteries
7.
Finish Moonlight Goddess, the 3rd of
the Myrtle Beach Mysteries.
8.
Support and cherish the WEP writing community.
They, above all else, kept me sane in an insane year!
Renée Stout - writer...author...publisher!
I know
it seems like a lot, but oh, how much time I wasted studying taxes? 😉
